Crazy in LOVE

I have finally met a man. One I trust completely and without hindrance.
EVERY STINKIN DAY he tells me how amazing I am.

We already have this little thing we do. Wherever we go he points out beauty to me and then tells me how it is a reflection of who God created me to be. He is tender and compassionate. He gently points out the incorrect mindsets I have and is graciously helping me overcome them.

He is also strong. I don't get away with squat. He lets me know exactly where he stands and we are honest with each other so that there is no guessing game in our relationship. I don't like surprises that much but he has assured me that all of his surprises are good. All of his surprises are good.

He stretches me to face my fears while holding me tight to protect me. He speaks truth into the lies I have believed for so very long. Little by little every day I am beginning to believe him. I am beginning to believe that:

I am lovable.
I am beautiful.
I am a warrior and I am a princess.
I am hug-able.
I am a delight.
I need someone to take care of me.

This is an overwhelming process. To be loved. To be desired and wanted. To know that every moment I sleep and every moment I am awake there is someone madly, desperately in love with who I am. The amazing thing is, he is in love with you too.

This is the faith I profess. That the One I love created me to love him back and ALL of history is the story of this epic romance. Again and again I run, fearful that he will find out what he already knows. I can't live without him. I can't live without Jesus.

Jesus is the one who speaks to all my dreams. He calls my destiny into fullness and hope into my heart. He breathes life into broken places and restores painful journeys.

He is the one that knows what I love. What things stir my heart. What moves me to compassion. He speaks to the deepest parts of me that no one else can see and helps me to realize that He can see me. He can hear me. He knows me. and He desires every bit of it.

He told me I was coming here to fall in love all over again.
And I have.
Totally and completely crazy in love with Jesus.

Dreamer

I have this dream. Not a dream I have at night, but one I have in my heart.

I have grown up in church. I have heard bible stories ALL MY LIFE.

But that is all they were, stories. It became my dream to know that everything the bible says is true and real and God is who He says He is and I am who He says I am. This is why I am on the journey I am. I want to know God for who He really is, not what my culture says, or church leaders, or even limit Him by what I know of Him through the word.

Last weekend I saw that God really is who He says He is. He still moves in mighty and awesome ways. I was healed last weekend of a long time issue with heart palpitations. I never told anyone because I don't have the time or money to focus on that simple thing. Besides, what you focus on you make room for, right?

Have you ever really read through the old testament in the bible? Did you know most of your hero stories come from it? The Incredible Hulk is after Samson. Cinderella is after Esther. Noah and the people of his time were the first to see rain. Moses lead an entire nation out of bondage. But even more than these are the wonders.

Elijah was taken up in a whirlwind. Enoch walked with God and was no more. Jonah was swallowed by a fish. Ravens fed Elijah. Jacob saw a ladder with angels ascending and descending from heaven. Daniel held a conversation with the archangel Michael and was then in a den with hungry lions who couldn't eat him. And that's just the well known stuff.

My desire is to know God and have these stories be my own. Because then God is who He says He is and I am who He says I am.

This is my current meditation:
God is who He says He is.
I am who God says I am.
EVERYTHING in the bible is for me today.

I am preparing myself to experience some pretty crazy awesome stuff just because these are the things I want to believe.
Power encounters where I remove myself and let God prove himself in a completely undeniable way.

The Simple Life

For a long, long time I have had a personal perspective that the supernatural workings of Jesus Christ were intended to be practical provision for His people. Such as, if you are sick, healing comes because that is how He provides for us.

I am currently living in an entire community of people who have chosen to live this way whether or not they understand the theology behind it.

Monday through Friday of last week God multiplied our food EVERY SINGLE DAY. Technically we counted the servings and there WAS NOT ENOUGH by our calculations! I always knew God was better at math than I was.

There has not passed a day that I am not prayed for. Not typical "Jesus loves you" prayers either. Destiny prayers. Prayers that speak to your deepest fears and set you free. Prayers that speak to your deepest desires to confirm they are really from God. Prayers that define who you are according the the Heart of the One Who is Madly in Love with His people.

I cry all the time. While I cook, when I go to bed, when I rise, when I worship, when the teacher is speaking, when I am alone, when I am in a group. So much that I have believed about myself has been a lie!!!!! And the very things I want to believe are truly how He looks at me.

All the while I am learning the language of God. Everything around me speaks of Him. What I paint, the pots I cook with, the food I eat, the conversations I have, the way I breath is a testimony to the One I love. Imagine freeing up yourself to believe that the things that are happening to you are speaking to your life. They aren't merely "life", God is speaking to me and I get to figure out what He is saying.

I have experienced time slowing down for us. Seriously. My roomie experienced the supernatural growth of her leg by an inch. As an intern I am experiencing transformation right in front of my eyes.

I am learning on an even deeper level, who I am, just because I am living simply. I listen to God, grow in what He speaks to me; cook natural, healthy food; clean; and take time for God to change the order in which it all happens. Because when I live simply I begin to see God in everything. Why I stopped at that red light. Why I missed that person by 3 seconds. Why I changed the meal plan. Why I made that phone call. Why I got that shirt.
The One I love is constantly weaving a tapestry of my life and if I live a simple one I can actually be a part of the process instead of seeing the whole thing at the end of my life.

This is what it means to live a simple life.
This is how we learn the languages of God, because we have time.